Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Week 94

Week 94: Resemblance of a human being – Status: Officially Dressed.

Your Life: Look at me! Look at me! I’m…I’m…a mess.

These days you are expected to get out the door in the mornings 45 minutes after waking up. This is why folks refer to mothers as miracle workers. Don’t even bother plugging in that curling iron, dearest. It’s just not going to happen. You can consider yourself lucky to make it out into the world with make up on and an outfit that matches AND fits. Not to worry. Your co-workers/fellow mommas/general population outside of your home will not pay much attention to that little sock stuck to your pant leg. The world understands that you are not part of the adult A-team anymore. Most will be happy you were able to remember to change your clothes at all.

On another note, your partner in crime AKA: spouse/significant other is completely confused by your manic parenting decisions. HELP HIM EAT. NO! DON’T HELP HIM EAT! S/he doesn’t know whether to “scratch his watch or wind his butt”.* It’s best for all involved if you stop delivering parenting instructions and/or advice to anyone. Just commiserate and do your best to help the situation. If you want to make a decision about what you are or are not going to do for your toddler, then spend some time talking about it after you put your little one to bed. Working together is crucial when surviving a toddler.

How your baby is growing: Dr. Teeth or Cookie Monster?

You can expect your toddler to embarrass you in front of your daycare provider when you come to pick him/her up by running away from you while you try desperately to put on his/her coat. S/he may even tell you bye-bye then break into a full-on meltdown whenever you say the words, “Go home”. This will make you feel like your child is demonstrating how awful it is to live with you but rest assured your daycare provider has seen it all.

On top of all of this s/he will also be in the midst of cutting those final molars. This brings joy to your heart because it means the light at the end of the teething tunnel is shining brightly. However, it also adds to the emotional rollercoaster your toddler embarks on every day. S/he will continue to resemble cookie monster until it’s all over and those poor bathtub letters don’t stand a chance. Perhaps you should keep those hidden away until the pearly whites are finished sprouting.

A Look ahead: Sick? Not sick just teething? Regardless, your little one is mega-cranky with a runny nose and you’re suspicious. No rest for the weary. Be sure to keep all hands and feet inside the car at all times and enjoy the ride!

*Quote is from the movie Steel Magnolias. I think this movie was referenced last week…I can’t keep up with myself.

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